A question from a concerned reader

DM, you gotta help me.

I've been emailing this guy for 4 weeks, and it was going well (or so I thought) - we were going to meet for beers and a Mexican meal next Tuesday.

He's just emailed me to ask if I like 'dressing up', and mentioned a stethoscope he bought off a site that imports second hand medical gear from Malaysia.

I'm no prude, but this kind of concerns me. I'm keen to meet him (he's cute, and we've got a lot in common), but I'm not sure I'm ready to embark on a relationship with a man who's going to want to 'check my pulse' so soon in our relationship.

What do you think?

Thanks DM.

Concerned, NYC


Dear Concerned,

Thank you for your enquiry.

Let's get to it. Nothing is 'wrong' in the confines of a loving relationship in which both parties agree to indulge in whatever pecadillo gets their mutual dogs barking. But as you say - is this not a little early to mention his sexual preferences? So saying, I'm sure there's something YOU like in the sack that might frighten the horses a bit if brought up too early in a burgeoning relationship.

But - you like the sound of him. He is attractive, you've been emailing him for 4 weeks, and you're clearly keen to meet him. I suggest you say kindly but firmly that you are a little alarmed by his early mention of his medical preferences, and ask him to keep them to himself until you have, at least, met.

Go and drink beers and eat fajitas, or whatever you do when eating 'Mexican'. And if he whips out his stethoscope on the first date, I suggest you whip out some chloroform and a rag, also freely available from the Malaysian websites you mention above.

Yours in Dating

DM x

PS Would you look good in a saucy nurse's uniform? If so, I suggest you give it a pop. You never know. You might like it.